Heath, The Ultimate Joker

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

I need it 4 yesterday - delivery 81

#406- "Well, I still think it’s a gray area. Remember that our customers are unsophisticated. They’ll read it, think it’s mistake and it’ll make us look bad. Put the quotes back in."
(Client, to Account Supervisor after being shown citations from both the Chicago Manual of Style and the AP Stylebook about not using quotation marks at the end of a paragraph when the quote continues into the next paragraph)

#405- "We're not going to do a brief because the project was already briefed past week."
(Agency, Account Executive after an Art Director had to take care of a project instead of his ill colleague)

Thursday, February 15, 2007

I need it 4 yesterday - delivery 80

#404- "Yeah, We don't like the orange color. Can't we just fade red into the yellow?"
(Client, giving direction to Designer)

#403- "We love it, but take out the bears (it was all bears) and it needs to be 80% white space and less busy, but we love it as is."
(Client to post production Art Director)

#402- "I see orange as between, like, yellow and red."
(Third-party Designer explaining his color choice for a logo)

#401- "Let's systematize this into a structure."
(Agency, Creative Director to Project Manager, just after coming up with brand new creative concept)

#400- "Summarising: you have to come up with three 30 sec. film scripts with all those benefits that I told you about. But before you do that, please send me few sentences of what you are going to come up with so I can send it to the Client as he has to get used to what you are going to come up with."
(Agency, Account Executive to Creative Director)

Friday, February 02, 2007

I need it 4 yesterday - delivery 79

#399- "Why don't we cast a 50-year old that looks like 38?"
(Client and Art Director disagree on how old the model should be. Account Executive comes up with brilliant compromise)

#398- "We don't like this line. It's advertising language"
(Memo from client's advertising department to advertising agency about copy for an advertisement)

#397- "We really like working with you, so lets try not to get lawyers involved"
(Client, President to Freelance Graphic Designer)

#396- "You can’t say no, you’re the agency"
(Client, to Account Supervisor, when he asked that it’s okay to ask for what they want 100% of the time and just be ready to be told ´no´)

Thursday, February 01, 2007

I need it 4 yesterday - delivery 78

#395-"I'm good at what I do, but I don't necessarily know what I am doing"
(Client, regarding their position at their company)

#394-"Just because I approved something doesn't mean you can hold it in my face!"
(Comment by client, to Agency President and Project Manager who were defending the fact that client's site was built following the approved information architecture)

#393-"Please rewrite the letter so that it will yield less response, as our call center is understaffed."
(Client memo to Agency)